Banging my head

I am a head banger. Not in the cool rocker kind of way, but in the "I am a type A personality that can't handle this" kind of way. It is not uncommon for Jeff to come downstairs to find me with my forehead banging against my desk or see me parked in the car with my head against the steering wheel. I bang my head for all sorts of reasons. When my favorite Ethiopian coffee runs out (I have a serious passion for good coffee), when Matti seems determined to push every boundary that we have, or this little family of fours amazing ability to trash every inch of the house. (Seriously- who smears toothpaste on the wall?)I bang my head out of the stress of knowing that we have a payment due tomorrow for Africa that is equal to two of my paychecks, and not knowing where that money is going to come from. I bang my head when I'm frustrated by people that live by some unknown code of rules and ethics. Who abuse their children or do really careless things to endanger others. I bang my head for the parents that fall through the cracks of our system and can't seem to get a break from the relentless pressures of life. I bang my head for the people that abuse the system and don't care.
Today, I'm banging my head for a little boy on the other side of the world. A little boy who only has two pieces of paper describing his surgeries. A little boy who lives in a country where there are only 60 doctors and even the best hospitals don't have oxygen. A little boy with a swollen face and veins protruding as his heart works furiously to keep him alive. I can't sleep without thinking about him. I don't know that more detailed medical records exist and if they do, I don't know how to get to them. I don't know how to help him.
The good thing about head banging is that it places you in a position to cry out to the One who has given us hope. The battle has already been fought, the price has been paid and victory is promised to all those who want it. We are never promised to have a life without heartache or a world without injustice. But we are told to fight for those who can't and that the battle that we see in this world is not the end of the story.

2 Chronicles 20:17
You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you, Oh Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid: do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you.